A Writer’s Block

Or do you prefer if I call it the Blogger’s block? How about a blog’s block? Sometimes I just want my monkey brain to not make a racket every time I try to concentrate.

Note (or do not note; I really can’t command you) : This is provided as an actual insight to whatever happens during a writer’s block. You all will probably have had the same sets of thoughts some time or the other. Even if you used different words like bottled up feelings or hollow emptiness, I am pretty sure you will understand what I was thinking .I know my writing (typing) style takes a hell lot of time to get used to; but 21 posts is enough. If you don’t want me to continue, dear lord, please do not give me a sign. *Waits* *Nothing Happens* Thank you.

I don’t consider myself a writer, I don’t write regular columns or rows for big-traffic generating websites. I don’t even know if I should label myself as a blogger. What are the minimum requirements? Do I have to have a mac? Do I need a certain number of posts? Should I write with certain frequency? Is there a minimum number of views and likes required? Do I need a custom domain? Or do I have to add my profile picture or a random nature pic after every post? Or does it depend on the number of comments my blog has? Do I have to be featured in the weekly newsletter? Must I visit some remote locations and try street food and review it? Maybe I should be struggling for some sort of breakthrough that’ll make me famous overnight.

Dear WP administrators, maybe you should update your “frequently” asked questions. I am sure I am more curious about myself rather than how WP works. 😛

Now, the writer’s block is a period when a writer is stuck creatively. He/she is not able to continue his unfinished works and struggles to write new things. This is where majority of us are most of the time. I mean I have to crawl through mental sewage of ideas just to put up a decent headline. I can not imagine Robert Brown writing Da Vinci’s Code and Angels & Demons one after the other while suffering from a block once in a month or so. Actually scratch that.  That is probably exactly what happened. But for most of us, we are stuck most of the time. And we need not make an unnecessary blog post about it.

Then there is this other thing called internet. It has all the recipes for getting out of any situation. I think I have even read a how-to about How To Be A God. This means that theoretically, we have the solution even before the problem is fully developed. This is where we have lost. The enemy has found our one weakness: we have the solution to ALL of the problems. What we lack is the knowledge of all the problems.

Too much eh? I know.  This is why I prefer to write about concrete topics. At least you don’t get to judge me based on the content. Yup, I’ll post 10 fun and interesting facts next time. Just to be by myself. *Insert the boring closing line about entropy continuing to increase*.

 

 

 

 

Title Unavailable

 Disclaimer: This post is not one of those where I mumble about nothing for half an hour and waste valuable server space. I just couldn’t think of a suitable title and one more “Chaotic Life” would be an overkill.

A happy new year to my one or two readers. I know, it is such a pity that this poor boy writes in hopes of getting views but he gets no likes or comments. Well, I’m done with all these pretences. I just want to commit to a regular writing schedule, that’s it. If it were twitter, I’d post something along the lines of #NewYearNewMe. If it was facebook, I would check in at the nearest bar with two others I hate spending time with. With instagram it’d be a selfie with girls in the background pouting with the tag #NewYearsEve. But, I love 9gag so I spent my time browsing memes, replying with did not read it gif (removed) and asking help from captains.

I was not attacked with Zubat’s confuse ray in the past , hence I do not mistake my blog for my personal diary. You won’t find any information which I do not wish to be known publicly.

… Yeah….what was this post about again??Nevermind. 

About updates: I am learning dance for my Aunt’s wedding, I updated to macOS, gained a few kilograms and lost a good amount of money due to my carelessness. On a romantic front, I am still as single as ever. Also the update for my intellect is still unavailable. The only good thing I did for the past few months was not getting depressed (When you think about it, there’s a victory in that).

Blah blah blah. This was how interesting my past few months have been. All in all, it was just another brick in the wall and I have become comfortably numb. The grass was greener, days were sweeter and with friends surrounding. 

I’ll leave you here today. I just want to keep my writing habit polished. A bad day for blogging indeed. Just keep in mind the third law of thermodynamics which is named “second law” because the third law was ridiculously simple and they had to rename it to zeroth law. 

 

Chaotic Habits

 

Some habits to confuse your peers

Take it as a guide to being the cool rebel, or genuinely follow them. Either way, if you continue do follow these things people will think that you are out of your mind.

In this era of 140 character tweets and status updates, with buzzfeed’s list of top 10 lists to expertvillage’s One minute tutorials, I prefer to write over 500 words. But sadly, I lack the constitution for reading such long posts just like you guys. That is why I’ll continue to write in the trending fashion. 

Everyday before I wake up, I try to think of ways to make my life more dramatic. I have compiled a list of habits that may enable me to do so. Enjoy the read:

1. Try to incorporate your non dominant hand in your day to day activities. It’ll confuse your friends.

2. If you can,be seen reading some text in a language other than english.

3. Have a hobby which is different from the norm. Reading and writing is good, sculpting and pottery is better.

4. Learning a programming language is impressive, but to truly make an impression one must learn to make algorithms.

5. Learn to make quick Fermi calculations, and watch people regard you as an alien.

6. Have a weird allergic reaction to a completely useless product. Ex: Be allergic from powdered sugar, but not sugar cubes.

7. Tell people that you are a vegetarian because you hate plants and not because you love animals.

8. Wear two different watches: one  tells the hour correctly while the other telling the minute.

9. Insist on eating food with bare hands, say that you are practicing hinduism.

10. Mysteriously disappear during full moon nights and be evasive with the answer.

11. Wear non-matching socks.

12. Never reply to any comments on your post for a while, then pick a random comment and reply with a clever remark.

13. Always pick up your phone on the eighth ring, get a counting timer as your ringtone.

14. Read two books at a time on any unrelated subjects. Ex: Read One Hundred Years of Solitude along with Ben Franklin’s Autobiography.

15. NEVER read this blog in front of other people. It is for the best that the secret to your awesome randomness doesn’t become public.

 

Thank you and have a nice day. Keep on increasing the entropy.

A Sado-Masochist Game

An Encounter with a girl

Yeah I know. It’s a clichè right? Everybody has their ‘one that got away’. So, I met this girl somewhere in 2011 in my first year at the university. We met through a mutual friend and soon we were like college buddies. She was in the same department, thus it was natural that we encountered each other almost every day.

I realised that your author-me fancied her a bit. But, I wouldn’t date her as she and I both came out of a long relationship. Time passed and we continued to remain good friends. The whole freshman year was the time of getting to know everyone, hence it passed way too soon.

When the second year started she was looking for a guy to settle down with. I was having way too much fun with my new found independence. She then decided to go into a relationship with my roommate……….wait! You didn’t come here to hear me moping about how my college life sucked, did you? Well, it didn’t. I want to talk about the dynamic tension between us two during the college years.

It was obvious from the first glance that we both enjoyed each other’s company. I was angry that she was with my friend and not me. She tried to make me jealous of her boyfriend; I gave her no satisfaction. I showed her that I wasn’t bothered by the thought of her; she gave me no reaction and that made me want her even more. She said we were and always will be good friends; I didn’t do ‘friendship’ with her. I would make comments about how I like the girl with the long hair; she’d make her hair into a hassle-free bun. She would notice guys with trim clothes and masculine swagger; I’d wear my lose jeans and t-shirt.I’d be the one to talk deep ; she’d laugh while blowing this off. She had a terrible taste in music, I could never listen listen to a good song only once.

There was a polar attraction between us. We had our differences starting from the start. But we always saw eye to eye when it came to others. We were equally saddened when we saw what the world was turning into. We could talk of anything for hours, but when it came down to us, we always fell short of conversation.

She wanted to hurt me, she was successful. I thought I would be happy if she were sad, it wasn’t true. Ours was a sad0-masochist game where both of us derived pleasure from our own hurt in seeing each other hurt.

We carried on with our lives as if nothing happened. We still don’t talk sometimes. But still, the entropy continues to increase.

DELETED!!!

Limerick Time

Because limericks are fun to read

There was a girl from a far away civilization

“She’s sleeping with my friend”, I had a realization

I reported her to jail

She couldn’t get a bail

Cuz homosexuality is still in the process of legalization.

 

A few years before twelve years ago

I lay in my bed with a girl from morocco

She farted during sex

and shat on my bed

Saying “When you gotta go, you gotta go”.