Blogging Mistakes – 101

It has been a long time since this blog has taken birth. What came as a pleasant surprise that some people actually read what I have written. Although I do like tiny yellow dots on that notification bell, I care about people too much to see them wasting their time. Time, which could be used on increasing their physical strength, looking for newer ways to challenge their creativity, learn to do quick calculation in their head, master an art, learn a foreign language, honing mental abilities, solving puzzles, oss  (or some shit).

I can not teach you to develop inquisitiveness, interest, ambitions or passion. Those things are developed naturally. For example, one can read hundred books on becoming an author. But not one of them will help him (for ambiguity) to create a good story. Things like that come from something inside of our minds.

Now where was I, yes. Blogging mistakes. I got sidetracked. Which is our mistake  number 1. Do not drift off-topic. Readers have limited time. They are busy looking at cat pictures. Hence, if you fail to stick to the subject at hand, you’ve made a wrong move.

Mistake number 2 is when you fail to attach media to your post. Always use a picture. It gives the reader something to look at while they pretend to read. Better if that picture is of a celebrity, or a cat. Maybe attach a video of a cat doing funny things.

The third thing you might be doing wrong is that you are using too less tags. Always tag your blog entries with funny, serious,cat, cate, dog, doggo, pupper, your name, bored, a famous celebrity, sherlock, wordpress, fresh. This way your blog will pop up on more search queries.

Mistake number 4: Not socialising. A blog rarely goes viral. People can look at a 30 minute video but will not read a 2 min long post. So, it is your responsibility to visit the “uncategorised ” section looking for new bloggers to follow. They’ll appreciate the gesture and follow you back as a thank-you. Also make sure to leave comments on featured blogs. That does not make you look like an attention seeker. People look at those comments and think “Hmm..he must a down to earth guy. Let’s check his blog”

Mistake number 5: Not using money. Your posts maybe of gold value, but they wont reach a wide audience. This is because some losers have already paid for their mediocre blogs to be featured on must-reads. Do yourself a favour and pay those advertising agents to reach a lot more people.

Mistake number 6: Pray, do not think yourself as an already successful author. You may think that people will hate your blog, challenge your beliefs, or refute your opinions. But sadly, some of your posts will not even be read. Avoid the mistake of giving up too early (like 5 years).

See. Am I not a great teacher? Never mind, do not answer that.

A Table for two : Not a date story

Basics gone wrong in mathematics

I am not a teacher. But, I like to impress little kids with my “in-depth” knowledge. I had already blown away three minds with Beyond Infinity?. This time I went for something simpler: mathematical tables.

I asked my younger cousin to write out the table of two (He is in 9th grade). He was naturally annoyed, but he wrote down something along the lines of-

2×1=2, 2×2=4, 2×3=6……….2×10=20

I prodded him further by writing it out as they taught him the first time. He went:

Two ones are two, two twos are four……..two tens are twenty.

I wasn’t done torturing him, so I asked him to kindly explain the process of multiplication as repeated addition. He gave me a ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. I explained I wanted to know that if he knew three times two equals 2+2+2 or 3×2 ? He said that it was elementary (maybe he was a Holmes fan). So I urged him (now how do you urge someone?) to kindly expand the table for two. He, for the final time gave me a look and wrote out:

2×1= 2, 2×2=2+2, 2×3=2+2+2…..2×10=2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2

I laughed my evil laugh as I knew that my cousin was successfully trapped. I proclaimed him wrong and made a cut mark across the page. The cousin wanted to know how and where he was wrong. I then made a pompous speech about how kids today focus less on learning and more on getting marks (kinda made me feel bad for putting him down so harshly).

I made him read out loud what he wrote earlier. Two ONEs are two, two TWOs are four… I knew he hit the Eureka moment then because his face lit up (and not because he ran around naked).

The correct answer was 2×1= 1+1, 2×2= 2+2, 2×3= 3+3, 2×4= 4+4……2X10=10+10. I explained that it was called the table of two not because the two was multiplicand , but rather because two was the multiplier in its table. The same went for all the other numbers as well.

Then I bowed down for the applause, having successfully made one more person’s day surreal.

A Writer’s Block

Or do you prefer if I call it the Blogger’s block? How about a blog’s block? Sometimes I just want my monkey brain to not make a racket every time I try to concentrate.

Note (or do not note; I really can’t command you) : This is provided as an actual insight to whatever happens during a writer’s block. You all will probably have had the same sets of thoughts some time or the other. Even if you used different words like bottled up feelings or hollow emptiness, I am pretty sure you will understand what I was thinking .I know my writing (typing) style takes a hell lot of time to get used to; but 21 posts is enough. If you don’t want me to continue, dear lord, please do not give me a sign. *Waits* *Nothing Happens* Thank you.

I don’t consider myself a writer, I don’t write regular columns or rows for big-traffic generating websites. I don’t even know if I should label myself as a blogger. What are the minimum requirements? Do I have to have a mac? Do I need a certain number of posts? Should I write with certain frequency? Is there a minimum number of views and likes required? Do I need a custom domain? Or do I have to add my profile picture or a random nature pic after every post? Or does it depend on the number of comments my blog has? Do I have to be featured in the weekly newsletter? Must I visit some remote locations and try street food and review it? Maybe I should be struggling for some sort of breakthrough that’ll make me famous overnight.

Dear WP administrators, maybe you should update your “frequently” asked questions. I am sure I am more curious about myself rather than how WP works. 😛

Now, the writer’s block is a period when a writer is stuck creatively. He/she is not able to continue his unfinished works and struggles to write new things. This is where majority of us are most of the time. I mean I have to crawl through mental sewage of ideas just to put up a decent headline. I can not imagine Robert Brown writing Da Vinci’s Code and Angels & Demons one after the other while suffering from a block once in a month or so. Actually scratch that.  That is probably exactly what happened. But for most of us, we are stuck most of the time. And we need not make an unnecessary blog post about it.

Then there is this other thing called internet. It has all the recipes for getting out of any situation. I think I have even read a how-to about How To Be A God. This means that theoretically, we have the solution even before the problem is fully developed. This is where we have lost. The enemy has found our one weakness: we have the solution to ALL of the problems. What we lack is the knowledge of all the problems.

Too much eh? I know.  This is why I prefer to write about concrete topics. At least you don’t get to judge me based on the content. Yup, I’ll post 10 fun and interesting facts next time. Just to be by myself. *Insert the boring closing line about entropy continuing to increase*.

 

 

 

 

A Treatise of Mind

Mind’s reflection on its own thoughts

Introduction

*Yay! those high school assignments at least gave me an idea on how to start writing*  I think I was on some stuff while I wrote the following. I have a deep fascination with mind and its processes. But, I can not create mass social experiments that’ll help me confirm my theories. Thus, I settle down for examining my own thoughts and coming up explanations for them. *I think I was possessed by a drunk greek philosophers’ ghost*.

Please do not judge me based on works like these. I am the funny guy, the joker, not some deep, dark, mysterious kind of guy.

 

The first reflection is on first impression

The first cut is the deepest. The chaos is neither a rapier nor a club, it neither slices through nor crushes you. It simply consumes. Everything and everyone that comes in its way is lost forever, the subject isn’t even aware of the process. That is why chaos is simply ignored by some, hated by some and feared by some. There are a few lost souls who are redeemed by it. The first impression is that one is chaotic merely for the sake of non-conformity, but the truth is that one feels so different that one feels there is something wrong with the world and not the self.

 

The second reflection is on the beliefs of mind

It’s always the second mouse that gets the cheese. The mind holds onto certain basic laws of morality with weak roots. Careful questioning and/or reading can simply uproot the mind with such a force that can cause actual nausea. The belief in belief tendency has and continues to leave the mind in a stalemate stance. Thus, mind sometimes finds itself helpless when the image of the world fails to the tests of the real world (moral dilemma, lesser evil,etc). The question “why do you believe what you believe” iterated over several times can seriously leave the mind with an existential crisis.

 

The third reflection is on emotions

Three is the number of completeness. Yes, the emotions make us complete. But they are nothing more than chemical reactions to an external/internal stimulus. Emotions are one of those intermediate reactions which can cause more chain reactions if not kept under check. The mind is simultaneously thankful and bewildered by these hormonal changes in the brain. Quoting the band Cabbage Garden’s lyrics “feelings and emotions are better left upon the shelf”. Also quoting the band Imagination Dragons “It’s where my demons hide” it is evident that the mind is aware of the negativity caused by emotions.

 

The fourth reflection is on Ego

Even though I don’t agree with objectivist philosophy, I think Ayn Rand was right when she said “Man’s ego is the fountainhead of human progress”. A sense of ego is what gives the definition to the sense of purpose of life. A mind can not and doe not comprehend the true vastness and randomness of the world around. The ego gives it the strength to create and hold on to particular ideas and ideals which in turn give it something a bit concrete to hold on to. The ego craves for self-satisfaction even if it achieved by altruism.

 

There, I said it. Now please stop haunting my mind and let me rest easy.

A Thought’s Journey

I have been thinking. I have been thinking about thinking. I have been thinking about thinking even when I am not thinking about thinking. Sometimes, I do not think about anything in particular and then think what I was thinking then. Confused eh? Well I get mental bruises on my elbows too when I do that; but anything to keep the brain in a good shape. Quoting the words of the great Dr. Richard Phillips Feynman

” I wonder why. I wonder why.

I wonder why I wonder.

I wonder why I wonder why

I wonder why I wonder!”

This led me to investigate the process of formation of ideas in the seldom used human brain. Hence, this entry will be about my thoughts and the journey of thought to idea to action. (Now, I have used ‘investigate’, but this just means that I laid on my sofa and stared at the ceiling). Hence, 25 revisions later, I give to you….. A Thought’s Chaotic Journey


It begins with an unexpected stimulus. You see, hear, taste, smell or touch something and your mind instantly makes a connection. It’s like your thoughts finally found words (or equivalent) to come to life. Also known to many as the “Ahh” moment *Archimedes and his fans call it the Eureka moment, though it comes with a side effect of running around naked* . It is where you either see the end product with crystal clarity or simply a  vague outline, surrounded by fog of practicality;sometimes even less. Either way, this first step provides the initial push needed for that particular electric signal to enter the conscious mind completely.

Once you are conscious of a thought, you may accept or reject its contents depending on the mood.Your hearts always beat a bit faster and you may think of all centuries, millenniums or even seconds ahead with the idea’s image in your mind. This I think is the closest I can describe intuition. *If you are into random facts, scientists are now advocating that  intuition is nothing more than repeated thinking for a long time which has now become effortless*. Now, once the thought enters the conscious realm, it becomes an idea. You can decide to be consumed by it or simply discard it.  In this phase, the thought is like a teenager. Your thought will go through many changes, will eventually mellow down, will bear strong roots, take up parts from similar and opposite thoughts, will shatter fellow thoughts, will tear itself apart before finally settling down to a mature form. The funny thing is this process may sometimes take less than a second.

In the third step the idea if accepted, manifests itself into actions. You can abort the idea now if and only if the result is not favourable. The End. *All steps do not have to be complicated you know* (But the thought changes from a desire to an intention is this final step. If planted with enough subtlety, you may not be aware if the idea was originally yours or someone else’s.)

Enough for now, I’ll give you more insights later. *I will have to think of a better closing line than the 2nd law of thermodynamics.*

 

My turn at word prompts

I hate these word prompts. They are a strange mix of bounded freedom. Somehow it makes me feel more entrapped than haiku, limerick or word-limit. So, to celebrate my hate towards something popular, I have decided to dedicate a special place in my blog. I know, I am acting like a hypocrite right now. But the main question is…… why did I decide to write a post after a month instead of in a fortnight? Gotcha eh! You can not predict my decisions just after ten blog posts. Maybe after 15, and definitely after 20. Yep, 20th is the new first. Now begins my actual post:

.

.

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Ummm…….Yeah…….You see. This is not what it looks like…

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*I am hesitating* ….. 😛

I know I am pathetic. But I’ll leave you with a very interesting excerpt from HPMoR.

Did some plans call for waiting? Yes, many plans called for delayed action; but that was not the same as hesitating to choose. Not delaying because you knew the right moment to do what was necessary, but delaying because you couldn’t make up your mind—there was no cunning plan which called for that.

Did you sometimes need more information to choose? Yes, but that could also turn into an excuse for delaying; and it would be tempting to delay, when you were faced with a choice between two painful alterna- tives, and not choosing would avoid the mental pain for a time. So you would pick a piece of information you couldn’t easily obtain, and claim that you couldn’t possibly decide without it; that would be your excuse. Although if you knew what information you needed, knew when and how you would obtain that information, and knew what you would do depending on each possible observation, then that was less suspicious as an excuse for hesitating.

If you weren’t just hesitating, you ought to be able to choose in advance what you would do, once you had the extra information you claimed you needed.

*Now imagine the next sentence being said in parseltongue; hissed*

But remember thiss, boy, other eventss proceed without you. Hessitation iss alwayss eassy, rarely usseful.

 

via Daily Prompt: Hesitate

Beyond Infinity?

A Meditation on Infinity and beyond

My idea of infinity: Whenever I think of this concept, I fail to grasp its meaning. Many wise men have tried to uncover its mystery. One generally thinks of something unbounded, limitless, that which does not change if something happens to it and even does something seemingly impossible.

Examples:

  1.  Any number divided by infinity is zero. 
  2. Take away, divide, add or multiply anything to infinity, it still remains the same. 
  3. Every point over an infinite line can be treated as its mid point. 
  4. An object placed at infinite distance gives out parallel rays of light. 
  5. There are infinite numbers in this universe. 
  6. Somewhere, -ve and +ve infinity meet and form a boundary.

All of these ideas are considered impossible right? But what if I say my impossible is more impossible than yours? Your day might turn out to be a bit more surreal. Well, this post aims at transporting you to a place where you question your own insanity. 

Beyond Infinity?

Doesn’t infinity already cover everything imaginable? Isn’t infinity that superset which contains every other sets? Well… It isn’t!

Consider:

  1. There are infinite numbers between 2 and 3, but none that is more than 3 or lesser than 2 (This means that when drawing a number line, we have already drawn infinite numbers). *This is an example of being infinite within a closed boundary*
  2. Out of infinte natural numbers, none are -ve. Out of infinite real numbers, none gives a negative answer on squaring. *Told you my infinity is more infinite than yours*
  3. Even though we know our universe to be limitless, it is not infinite. *This might help you a bit to accept big bang more*
  4. Whenever we take out two litres of any liquid, we already do infinite amount of work: First taking out 1 litres, then half, quarter, eighth litre and so on……INFINITE times. *Hence you can do infinite work without crossing the limits of ordinary*  /A big blow to those ‘hard-workers’ innit?/
  5. Place a lens in front of another lens near the focus. You will see converging ray of light for a distant object (just like in telescope). Tada….the object has now been placed beyond infinity.

That’s all for now. Let us take a deep breath and come back to the real world, where the entropy continues to increase. Doesn’t matter how much you suspend your disbelief. 

Through the looking grass

A Stoned Blogger


With an irrelevant picture that subconciously distracts you from the low quality content 

**/ Dear Government Intelligence Agencies, this work is completely fictional and I do not know where or how or who deals in/with cannabis/** 

The experience of good quality grass enjoyed with a group of good friends is hard to explain. We talk about things which should not be trifled with. Things like 

“What if we fry a boiled egg?” 

“Who is John Galt?”

 “What was going on in his mind when man first learned to milk a cow?”

 “Does buffalo salad contain buffalo or chicken?”

 “Why do all the fans rotate  anti-clockwise?”

 “How can I can a can as canners can a can?”

 “Maybe it wasn’t the killing curse that struck Harry”

 ” Maybe winter came before the chicken or egg”

 “What if everything isn’t grey, just plain black and white; what would happen to Sasha Grey or Christian Grey?”

Sometimes we even talk of everyday issues:

-An electron would float everywhere if an atom were to be isolated. 

-The only identity of our’s is the brain. If we could preserve the brain, we could theoretically preserve ourselves. 

-There is no continuity in matter. Yet, there are definite boundaries of objects. 

-The Raven just reflected Poe’s dark inner fears, just like the three witches did Hamlet’s. 

-You can mix red and white to get yellow paint, you just have to add a little yellow paint first. 

– If edward could hear thoughts, why didn’t he hear Alice’s when she was seeing the future?

-Stirring is more effective when done in criss-cross rather than circular. 

-You can not eliminate faliures, you just have to maximize success. 
We are rare gems eh? We have long debated about happiness and how can it hinder true development. We know how being happy is a bit overrated, while being content is the true object to be coveted. We think of how we are a product of our environment, yet how the environment is a projection of our own minds. We wonder the fragility of our beliefs and how one carefully worded question peirces them. We talk of the coherence of basic thought processes between friends, limitations of imagination, the purpose of existence, the illusion of understanding, the boundaries between contradiction & the concept of boundaries without limitation. 

But we never seem to remeber any good ideas after we have sobered up, maybe the ideas dissolve away into oblivion to increase the overall entropy of our universe. 

If you gonna die…

Die with your boots on.

Something to Keep you motivated

I won’t lie. The enemy is strong. You have to be on your toes for your survival (also a good calf exercise). We have got to prepare ourselves.

We will be crushed, we will be broken, but we will not stop. We will rewrite the story of this war where we defeated the enemy using Mac and Cheese. We will stand for everything which is sacred: potatoes, black salt, cats and most importantly, Green Vegetables. Never has the opportunity sounded more glorious. We will rise to the heights and push the enemy from the top. Our children will read the poems of the enemy tumbling down the hill instead of fat Jack and plump Jill. We will cut down Jack’s beanstalk and make the giant fall down. (Jack seems to be too much associated with heights, I’ll have to investigate further).

(If you’ve read Tolkien) A day may come when the courage of men fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship. But it is not this day. An hour of wolves and shattered shields when the age of Men comes crashing down! But it is not this day! This day we fight! By all that you hold dear on this good Earth, I bid you stand! Men of the West!

The point is not to win. The point is not to defeat the enemy, but to make them afraid. I call upon you, my friends from chaos; to come forth and defeat the enemy from darkness beyond darkness.

*Play ride of Valkyries as background music*

*Goes to the nearest mental hospital to get his head checked*

 

 

Title Unavailable

 Disclaimer: This post is not one of those where I mumble about nothing for half an hour and waste valuable server space. I just couldn’t think of a suitable title and one more “Chaotic Life” would be an overkill.

A happy new year to my one or two readers. I know, it is such a pity that this poor boy writes in hopes of getting views but he gets no likes or comments. Well, I’m done with all these pretences. I just want to commit to a regular writing schedule, that’s it. If it were twitter, I’d post something along the lines of #NewYearNewMe. If it was facebook, I would check in at the nearest bar with two others I hate spending time with. With instagram it’d be a selfie with girls in the background pouting with the tag #NewYearsEve. But, I love 9gag so I spent my time browsing memes, replying with did not read it gif (removed) and asking help from captains.

I was not attacked with Zubat’s confuse ray in the past , hence I do not mistake my blog for my personal diary. You won’t find any information which I do not wish to be known publicly.

… Yeah….what was this post about again??Nevermind. 

About updates: I am learning dance for my Aunt’s wedding, I updated to macOS, gained a few kilograms and lost a good amount of money due to my carelessness. On a romantic front, I am still as single as ever. Also the update for my intellect is still unavailable. The only good thing I did for the past few months was not getting depressed (When you think about it, there’s a victory in that).

Blah blah blah. This was how interesting my past few months have been. All in all, it was just another brick in the wall and I have become comfortably numb. The grass was greener, days were sweeter and with friends surrounding. 

I’ll leave you here today. I just want to keep my writing habit polished. A bad day for blogging indeed. Just keep in mind the third law of thermodynamics which is named “second law” because the third law was ridiculously simple and they had to rename it to zeroth law.